Wednesday, October 22, 2014 Tishri 28, 5775

Miriam Steinberg-Egeth

Jewish Exponent Blogger

Dear Miriam,

I know it's conventional wisdom that the guy should pay on the first date, but I disagree - I think it should be split 50/50. That being said, I can't find a single guy or girl who agrees with me. Speaking from a logical, feminist, 21st century perspective, aren't I right?

Signed,
Equality Now

Dear Equality,

From a logical, practical (and yes, feminist) standpoint, you're totally right. Unfortunately, like everyone else you've already asked, I'm still going to advocate that the guy pays on the first date.  Also, before I go any...

Comment0

Dear Miriam,

I'm a short, bald guy. To Jewish girls, I'm pretty sure this is akin to being a diseased leper. Will I ever find love?

Signed,
Simply Single

Dear Simply,

Without knowing you or anything (else) about you, I feel fairly confident in saying yes! As short and as bald as you may be, you obviously have a sense of humor, and that is a quality that many women find as attractive as any physical feature. But you have to find the right woman to appreciate all you have to offer.

Don't chase after tall supermodels or women who...

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Dear Miriam,

I just got married, and I'm debating whether or not to change my last name. While I love my hubby, I also love my family, and my last name represents a lifetime of their love and my happiness. From an ease of paperwork / benefit of future children perspective, it clearly makes sense to change my name, but I get sad when I think of saying goodbye to such a big part of me. Also, I hate hyphens. What's a girl to do?

Signed,
Mrs. Something

Dear Mrs.,

If there were an easy answer to your question, I wouldn't have a hyphenated last...

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Dear Miriam,

Last week, I went to the wedding of my boyfriend's best friend from childhood. Neither my boyfriend nor any of his friends are Jewish. During dinner, one of these friends used an anti-Semitic slur. No one, including my boyfriend, responded or called him out on it in any way. As the only Jew at the table, I didn't say anything either. I'm still angry about the whole incident, but my boyfriend thinks I just need to get over it. What should I do?

Signed,
Only Jew at the Table

Dear Only,

It's understandable that you're upset, but in...

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Dear Miriam,

I've just been invited to an outdoor engagement party where guests are instructed to dress "summer chic." I have no idea what this means for me or for my boyfriend, plus it's going to be really hot out. Help!

Signed,
Sweaty Chic

Dear Sweaty,

Though I like being outdoors, I really dislike outdoor parties that are anything other than an impromptu get together with friends (or the occasional Shabbat picnic lunch). As I said when planning my own wedding, "I have enough to worry about without also worrying about the weather every day...

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Profile

I am extremely proud to be a part of making the Philadelphia Jewish community the best it can be.

I am a co-founder of Minyan Tikvah (a lay-led prayer group in Center City Philadelphia that meets once a month for traditional egalitarian Shabbat services), a founder of a former matchmaking service for Jewish graduate students, a children’s book reviewer, a former elementary school teacher, a pretty decent cook and a mom to two beautiful children.

I spent years as the director of Hillel of Greater Philadelphia’s Jewish Graduate Student Network before resigning to spend more time with my family. My husband, Marc, likes to say that I knew more people within a week of moving to Philadelphia than he knew after six years here.

I’m originally from the tiny town of Fredonia, NY, and sometimes I still stare at the skyscrapers and marvel at how many Jews I know.

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